Time for Advice

You may or may not have heard - but Kelly and I are pregnant. We are excited (and obviously freaked out!) to be starting this new stage of our lives. But I would love, love, love all the advice and stories that are available in the wealth of wisdom of the Women of Christian Associates. So, leave me all your advice on pregnancy, newborns, etc, etc, in the comments!


oh - you might like the details. The due date is October 4 (so I should be nice and round by staff conference :) ) and we will find out the sex, but not for at least a few weeks yet. If you would like to hear Kelly's thoughts on becoming a father, and see some ultrasound pictures, you can check out his blog at here

Questions for the Heart

This morning connecting with God did not come easily. I knew I needed to, but my will wasn’t showing any sign of winning over my rather listless emotions. It was just one of those days where I was ‘out of sorts’

Whether my symptoms were the remnants or the cause of a restless night, I don’t know. I was experiencing anxiety about the future and the decisions that need to be made to get there. Frustration at the bureaucracy that is slow to provide the information that will give clarity. Weariness at plugging away--seemingly endlessly--at several projects I’ve undertaken. Not to mention this never-ending winter!

Spring is a month late arriving in Holland this year. Yes, I can hear the Canadian derision as I’m told that I’ve become spoiled by gorgeous arrays of tulips in April. But honestly, we pay our due at other times of the year! It’s time to be able to go outside when the sun is actually shining and soak in some beauty. I connect with God easiest out in his creation, and I need a change of setting.

I put on my Nordic sweater, pulled my winter jacket on top, and pushed out on my bike, thinking that I just might find a sheltered spot in the sun before the clouds won out. Pedaling helped to clear my head, and eventually I found a spot where I could sit for a while and sort out my thoughts.

What’s going on in this heart of mine? It’s a question I’ve learned to ask often. In giving its answer, my heart has a chance to get beyond itself. I uncover the things that lie buried inside and transformation happens. The biggest change usually comes in my readiness to hear God’s voice.

Today I took a look at the anxiety, frustration and weariness that were defeating me. They’re each valid, for sure, but they all add up to pretty small stuff in the big picture of things.

Can I entrust them to God and live in faith today? Laid out there clearly before me, the answer was simple. Of course I can trust God today and walk with him faithfully. And the future? Well, let’s just do what’s before me today and leave the future to the One who holds it in his hands.

An amazing thing happened right after that. The crusty shell that had encased my heart during the night simply disintegrated. I opened the Bible and God’s Word came alive to me. Instant fellowship. Sweet presence. Rich food for my soul.

And before the clouds had covered the sun until another day, the sun was shining brightly in my heart. Thanks Lord!

CAI Women's Gathering

So, the first CAI Women's Gathering happened at the beginning of this month. For those of us who weren't able to go, it would be really great to hear about how it went, what ya'll did, etc, etc! Feel free to just leave a comment on this post if you went and want to share something - or write a new post.

Spanish is my new skinny

When I was in high school and college, I always had these big plans during every break that somehow I would come back skinny and everyone would think I was amazing and want to be my friend. I would walk in on the first day of school and everyone would say "Is that April - wow she looks great" and all the popular people would rush up to invite me to their houses.

I've pretty much gotten over that by now. I guess six years of school will teach you something, if nothing other than that summer holidays do not lead to miraculous body changes unless surgery is involved. Now I've realized that Spanish is my new skinny.

I spent the last 2.5 years living in Madrid and trying to varying degrees to learn Spanish while living and working in an English-saturated environment. The longer you live in a foreign country, the more embarrassing it becomes that you are not yet fluent in the language. Sure, I've gotten to the point that I can order a meal at a restaurant, potentially even with flair, but I'm not really fooling anyone other than my parents. So, when we decided to move to a small town on the east coast of Spain this year, the secret little thought popped into my head "when we visit Madrid, I'll wow everyone with my newfound ability to speak Spanish."

My plan this whole time has been that I would come back fluent and everyone would think I was amazing. Before we visited in November I thought "we'll go to our friends house who speak Spanish and English and spend the whole night in Spanish." When that didn't happen, I though when we visited at Christmas "when I see Mati (with whom I usually converse in English) at the Christmas service, I'll only speak to her in Spanish and she'll be so impressed at my improvement." I'm not sure if it didn't happen because of habit or because I didn't want her to actually be unimpressed at my de-provement.

This is when I realized that Spanish is my new skinny. When I can speak Spanish fluently, I will have arrived as a social contributor. When I can speak Spanish fluently, all of life will be better, miraculously. I'm beginning to wonder if I should skip the six years of school and realize that in most instances, lasting change does not come about without quite a bit of hard work and dedication. At least, since as far as I know, there isn't a surgery that can make me speak Spanish.

Simplicity

by Heather

For the past few weeks I have been asking God what He wants me to concentrate on in my personal life and growth. In many ways I feel like I spent the first 36 years of life learning the basics; and I am just now getting to the "real" lessons. Enough wasting time. I want to start learning the important things that will really make a difference to my soul, my family, my friends, my church, my community.

I tend to complicate things. I can be all about the idea of something. If you give me a project I'm happy to color-code it, chart it, get a new notebook for it, collect colored pens and paperclips to track it and get everything all lined up.

Sometimes, I'm not so good with the follow-up.

Several years ago, before we came to Europe, I read an article about "quiet-times." The woman who wrote it set aside 1 hour every day, and she had all sorts of valuable ideas of what to do in that hour. So I found a 3-ring binder, I printed up prayer lists and Bible verses, put in dividers and all sorts of snazzy things. For awhile, I actually used it, and managed to spend the hour most days.

But the whole "system" became too much for me. It began to overwhelm me. If I felt at all like I couldn't do the whole hour, it became easier to just skip the whole devotions thing.

This is a pattern in my life; not just a one-time thing. Recently, I was working on some personal development issues. I asked a friend to give me some feedback in specific areas. One of her comments was this: " I think you often set high goals or too many goals that make perseverance nearly impossible for anyone, when you would probably be much more successful if you kept them smaller or sharper focused, really working to stay consistent and persevere on some realistic goals instead of trying to change your whole world at once."

It makes sense to me that God is asking me to simplify. For the next six months, we are basically in transition and in limbo at the same time. Although we will continue to live in the suburbs, our ministry will be in the city. That is going to be hard because we're going to be pulled in two directions. School and kids and home are going to be going the opposite direction of ministry. And my heart is already anxious to make the move.

I could make the next six months a lot harder on myself by making it too complicated. So I am deliberately going to seek simplicity. I'm going to leave the 3-ring binder wherever it is (yes, I still have it and still feel like I should use it sometimes.) Instead, I will take my Bible, maybe a notebook and only ONE color pen, and sit with Jesus and talk to Him and just work on getting to know Him more.

During these next six months, I will throw things away, weed through my possessions and ask God to help me not buy a single thing I don't really need. I will learn to sift through my tasks and find the ones that count. I will spend more time snuggling with my children, laughing with them, helping them learn about life. I will hold my husband's hand more. I will spend time with people I love, and also with people I don't, but need to. I will ask God to keep my greed in many areas in check.

I will not make New Year's resolutions. I will not make any charts to track the progress of anything. I will not buy any new pens until the ones I have run out of ink.

Simplicity. It's out there somewhere.

I'm a reader

I'll admit it, I'm a reader, not a writer. So today, I offer two things that I read that really spoke to me: the first a reflection on Mark 1 and the paralytic man who was put through the roof, and the second a reflection on Sukkot/Feast of Booths and God's provision.

Plaza Las Aulas

Hi - I think I've written a few posts on here already, so I figured I might as well give in and become an actual contributer!

So, I love where I live. I'm slowly adjusting to "small town life" again and confess some homesickness for the city-life in Madrid, but I really love where we've been put down. Ok - the beach helps :) But more than that, we live on this really classic Spanish plaza. There are a few cafés. People meet-up to go out, or take their dogs out. Evidently the grand fiestas take place here in the early spring -- which might mean a week of no sleep, judging by the average Spaniard's celebrating habits. And for the last three days, we have been privileged to view afternoon puppet shows for the local children. To me, there is nothing like the vibrancy of life that occurs in a Spanish plaza around 7 pm. And there is also nothing like hearing, seven storeys below, over 100 children simultaneously shrieking with laughter, howling in fear, and screaming "HOLA!!" to a visiting puppet.

I love where I live and I'd love to hear what ya'll love about where you live.